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Getting Handsy: Female Masturbation Tips for Beginners

Sex & Relationships

Getting Handsy: Female Masturbation Tips for Beginners

Masturbation can be a truly mind-blowing experience! Read on for a beginner's guide to hand pleasure.


Hand pleasure is a totally satisfying experience that, sadly for most people out there, often doesn’t get the attention it so deserves. Enticing by itself or a satisfying addition to oral play, masturbation sets the scene for mind-blowing pleasure. Read on for a beginner’s guide to masturbation and stimulation - it won’t be long until you’re a pro at getting handsy!



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First Things First

Have you washed your hands lately? No? (Record-scratching noise.) Before you even think about getting frisky with your fingers, make sure your hands are clean. You want your partner (or yourself, if you’re going solo) to be focused on pleasure, not worrying about dirty hands.

While your hands are getting sudsy, take a second to check out your fingernails. Are they sharp or rough? Is there dirt underneath your nails? Just remember, cleanliness is next to sexiness. So please. Before you add this valuable skill to your sexual arsenal, file your fingernails smooth and remove any dirt from under them.

Go For Lube

As with all things between the sheets, a little bit of lubricant is your best friend—think seductively smooth sensations with enough slip ‘n slide potential to get the job done. After all, a 2010 study from Indiana University’s Center for Sexual Health Promotion found that more than 70% of women use lubricant to make sex more pleasurable. Follow the trend and see where it takes you!

Whether you prefer water-based or silicone-based lubricant, just apply a single pump’s worth of product to your finger(s) before you start massaging the clitoris or navigating the G-spot. Lubricant will not only make for a smoother entry, but its slippery texture will add another tantalizing dimension to this experience.

Shhh. Are You Listening?

Your hands are squeaky clean and a trusty bottle of lubricant is at the ready. Now what? Before getting hands-on with your partner, make sure the scene is set —turn the lights down low, and set the mood with kisses and other foreplay. You can even get yourself in the mood with a sexy playlist and a comfortable position. When it’s time, go slooooowly and gently—at least to begin with. Everyone has their preference as to masturbation speed and penetration—one that can (admittedly) change at any given moment. You’ll figure out your own preference (if you don’t know already), but if you’re with a partner, listening is key. How are they responding? Your lover may not always give you verbal cues, but if it’s feeling good for them, you will know, no question.

Try different techniques to determine what your partner likes. Switch from one to two fingers and change up your speed, gauging their response all the while. Search for the G-spot—it’ll be a few inches inside the vagina on the top side, and it’ll have a slightly different texture from the rest of the vaginal wall (bonus: these tips apply to self-pleasure as well!). Spice up your partner’s experience (and show off your dexterity) by penetrating with one or two fingers while using your thumb to gently massage the clitoris. If you’re really feeling fancy, go for a double whammy—penetration and cunnilingus.

And don’t forget to bring your trusty wingman along for the ride—a toy will help you get to O-Town that much quicker. Try a few different kinds of toys to find the one that works best for solo or couple’s play, and don’t forget to have some good, not-so-clean fun.